Anyone who knows me, knows how attached I can become to people, pets and things. I know that God doesn’t want us to be a slave to material things but sometimes material things end up representing something else. I don’t embrace change. I like routine and stability. So in 2003 when I bought a black mustang convertible with a tan top, it was a break in that routine and stablity…and it was a big change that really was more about the change that was taking place in my life. I was breaking free from a part of myself and letting go of the past. I wanted to be a different person and I was for a while. I was a person that I almost don’t recognize as part of myself now. It was a part of me that desired freedom, danger and risk and didn’t really care about tomorrow. I was living for the moment. Tomorrow I am selling my car and buying a new one. I am excited about my new car because it’s an upgrade from the one I have now. It’s got fewer miles, a cd changer, leather seats and it doesn’t leak. Tonight I cleaned out my car, vacuumed the interior, washed it, filled up the gas tank and finally got the cd that’s been stuck in it for over a year out of the cd player. To me saying goodbye to this car, is bittersweet. It’s the end of one chapter and the start of another. I am saying goodbye to not just a car but the memories that it represents. I named this car “Sandi” because it was me transitioning from Sandra Dee to Sandi in black leather pants in Grease. I spelled it with and I because that is how I spell my name. I am not sure that I will name this car. The transition from one black convertible with a tan top to another black convertible with a black top isn’t as life changing as when I went from the hard top to the convertible. I guess by keeping with the convertible I am not ready to let go of that part of me that wants to be free and a little crazy. I love to feel the wind in my hair and the sun beating down as I drive. It’s exciting when you realize it’s the perfect weather for a top down day. It’s fun to sing along to the radio and raise one hand in the air to feel the breeze. Thank you Sandi for all the fun we shared. You be good for your new owner. You’ll always be my first convertible.
An Ending and A Beginning
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